The to-do list around our home is growing longer and longer by the day. There are so many little projects I want to tackle, but it is just too overwhelming. Instead of accomplishing them I spend my time thinking, dreaming, writing, becoming more and more unproductive. Where is the line between impulsive and over thinking? When do you just need to stop thinking and start doing? I wonder if I ever knew where the line was or if I just moved it the last few years.
I used to be such a "task-oriented girl"...not being that girl wouldn't be so bad if I had become a "in-the-moment-girl". I know that I missed little moments with my family because I was too wrapped up in getting things done. I know that I lost opportunities to teach, serve, and encourage others. So now that I am not accomplishing much why am I still missing these moments and opportunities?
I need Jake to shout, "SLOW DOWN MOM because I turn 13 in a few months and in the next few years I will make choices that will shape who I am and will be." I need Emma Grace to whisper, "SLOW DOWN and listen mom because the problems I am sharing with you may seem silly and insignificant, but to me they are huge. I need you to acknowledge my feelings and give me godly insight and encouragement." I need Scottie to giggle and say, "SLOW DOWN mom and share Jesus in a real way because I am capable of having a relationship with Christ". (Oh that one hurts my heart) I need Zoey to babble, "SLOW DOWN momma and enjoy my new discoveries and my many firsts because I can bring so much joy and unity to our family." I need Scott to remind me in his sweet gentle way to SLOW DOWN and cherish our quiet moments because one day the children will be gone, and we must have a thriving relationship now and then.
The truth is what I hear in this moment is my Abba Father singing over me and speaking to my soul. "SLOW DOWN my child and spend time with me. You may not be checking off items on the to-do list, but that was never my intention for your life. My desire for your life is to love me and love others. My desire for you is to have a growing relationship with me. My desire for you is to raise a godly, young man and 3 godly, young ladies whose lives will glorify ME, their Abba, not you! My desire is for you to serve your family, church, and community as though you were serving Me. It isn't about being superwoman; it is about being a godly-woman"
SLOW DOWN....slow down.....take it all in and let my life (your life) glorify the Living God who created me (you), loves me (you), and died for me (you). I hear you....slow down!