This week is spring break and we invited three of our nieces to stay with us. We have had so much fun with them and there has been LOTS of laughter. This evening I sat with two of these young ladies and we talked about life. Somewhere in the midst of our talk they imitated me when I correct or discipline or "get onto" one of the kids. I will be honest, their imitation startled me because the way they saw my actions was not how I see myself.
I had that "Who me?" moment!
I realized tonight that my tone and correction are seen by my kids entirely different than how I intend it to be as I correct them. I need to stop and look at myself through my children's eyes and today my nieces gave me a glimpse. I am not proud of what they see....
If I want my children to be kind and speak with love to one another, then I need to have kindness and love spilling out of my heart and mouth.
If I want my children to be respectful to others, then I need to demonstrate respect even in the midst of times of correction.
If I want my children to demonstrate the fruits of the spirit, then I must demonstrate the fruits of the spirit.
If I want my children to handle conflict in a calm, godly way, then I certainly need to handle conflict in a calm, godly way.
What an awesome opportunity to see me through the eyes of someone else, but this opportunity hurts and I cannot ignore what I saw. I must slow down and become the person I so desperately desire my children to become.
Lord, please start with me. I ask that the Holy Spirit would help me to see myself as they see me. I ask the Father to teach me how to parent as He wants me. No more excuses or disbelief...no more "Who me?". This realization may hurt, but from pain comes change and from a godly change God will be glorified. So Lord, please start with me!!!