Mourning to Celebration

I want to stop mourning and simply celebrate!

I recently had an encounter with a well-meaning woman.  When she discovered that I had a special needs daughter, she shared with me something she read.  The story was basically about how we plan and plan for a trip to Italy (the birth of the "perfect" baby) only to discover that we are in Holland.  I think she was trying to help me to understand my experience …or perhaps she just wanted to share.  Although I completely understand that she was just trying to relate to me, I wanted to tell her that she really has no idea what it is like to parent a child with special needs.  She really just cannot relate.

And then…

I went to a conference for women this past weekend and I had TONS of thoughts and ideas about ministry, family and life go through my head.  There was one phrase that I just couldn't shake…stop mourning and celebrate.

I mourn that my daughter doesn't have "friends" her age.
I mourn that my daughter was overwhelmed at the father and daughter dance because it was too loud.
I mourn that Emma Grace (my almost 13 year old daughter) plans to always have a room for her sister in her house when she is married.  (I know it is sweet and amazing, but it is also sad.)
I mourn that Jacob, Emma Grace and Zoey have to gauge their sister's mood before they joke around and sometimes even speak to her.  
I mourn that my daughter will not go to homecoming or prom.
I mourn that my daughter will not experience life as a college student.
I mourn that my daughter will never experience what it feels like to fall in love.
I mourn that my daughter will never have a wedding.
I mourn that my daughter will not be a mother.
I mourn that Scott and I will not be empty nesters.  (selfish, I know)

I am tired of mourning the never.  I want to celebrate who she is and what she can do.  

"For You formed my inward parts;

You wove me in my mother’s womb.

 

I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

Wonderful are Your works,

And my soul knows it very well.

15 

My frame was not hidden from You,

When I was made in secret,

And skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth;

 

Your eyes have seen my unformed substance;

And in Your book were all written

The days that were ordained for me,

When as yet there was not one of them."

Psalm 139: 13-16

My daughter is perfect.  

She may not experience the same life experiences as Emma Grace.  

Scottie is perfect.  

She experiences life differently, but that does not make it less of a life.  

She loves differently, but she doesn't love less.  

She sees the world differently, in fact she sees more.  

How do I shift my feelings and thoughts from mourning the nevers and celebrate the what is and what can be?  
Today, I choose to believe that God has a plan for her life.  That plan is beautiful, amazing and FULL.  She will not have less of a life, but rather her life will enrich the lives of those she loves.  I celebrate my daughter because her Creator knitted her together wonderfully.

If I want her family and the world to celebrate Scottie, then it must start with me.

Today, I will stop mourning and CELEBRATE!.

CELEBRATE!

CELEBRATE!